Magical Places: forgiveness

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. ... Albert Einstein

I'm a creative. I don't know how to be anything else. Everything I see, hear, smell is fuel for my muse. I've had several careers, but was never content until I found my niche.

Now, I run a home-based studio, FyreWork Designs where I freelance as a photographer, writer and designer. I wear many hats, but love what I do. I enjoy working in variety of artistic venues: digital alchemy, multi-media as well as mixed media. I often use my photography as a springboard to create fanciful images.

You'll find variety here, complete with comments as the muse sees fit. You've been warned ;-)

Oh, and in case you didn't know ... I'm a cancer survivor. Every day I wake up, I've survived!

Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Forgiveness?! ...

10:39 AM |

Posted by ~Visions~ |

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"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." .... William Blake

I've been in deep conversations with myself for a while now. I know I need to forgive the past, so that I can create a better future. But there are so many layers. So much that has been done that was never acknowledged. However, in order to let go, I have to forgive the unforgiveable.

Writing about this now, is my way of finding closure. My hope is that each time I tackle past hurts, I can turn the page and forgive the person that caused me unnecessary pain.

But I'm struggling. It's very difficult. I can forgive so many things. It's really not in my nature to hold a grudge. But it's hard to forgive those you thought had your back, only to find they were busy plunging daggers into it.

I came across a lovely meditation yesterday on Reiki and forgiveness. It was a sign, I thought. I'm a Reiki master and am always teaching that in Reiki there are no coincidences. I've been battling with myself over this forgiveness theme for a while. So when I saw this meditation, I tried to focus on it. I went to sleep last night trying to pry the cold, icy grasp of anger from my gut, and replace it with an inner calm. It didn't quite work.

I'm still striving to sort out so many things, but I'm determined to find a solution. I've worked hard on forgiving most of those who have hurt me in my life. I had lessons to learn. I get that. But some things, I just can't get past. Not yet, and I'm working so hard to do just that.

I want to scream at my sister who has tried for years to alienate my kids by telling them lies. All the while, she was the unfit one who walked out on her little baby boys to pursue men and drugs. Why would she try to hurt me with untruths about things that never happened? Was it to justify her own bad behaviour? If it had stopped, perhaps I could have just let it go. But she continues to this day taking great delight in her fabrications. How does one forgive that? How do you overcome hurt after hurt after hurt?

I have prayed about this ... asking for guidance. And then, when I read that article yesterday, I realized it gave me the opportunity to forgive the person, without condoning the act. So ... here goes.

I forgive you, Linda. I know you have an illness and I should be the better person. So I forgive the soul that you are. But I don't think I can ever forget the terrible things you've done to me. Maybe someday, but not today.

Today's Flowers and Bluberry craft and hobby time